Organise with ease
My wedding
Checklist
Budget
Vendor manager
Guest list
Wedding Website
Personalise your wedding - Coming Soon
Traditional weddings
WeddingMate is pleased to announce that we will soon be catering for all South African traditional weddings. Get your traditional weddings in one easy to use space.
WEDDING CEREMONY
Embarking on a lifelong commitment with the person you love is a momentous occasion, but that doesn’t mean it’s all serious business. Many couples choose to incorporate funny wedding ceremony readings to help lighten up the mood with a good balance of wit and humor. Of course, if you and your partner are writing your own vows, including some funny tidbits is a great way to make your ceremony feel more personal, but it doesn’t have to stop there. Selecting funny wedding ceremony readings is an opportunity to showcase both of your personalities while putting a smile on all your guests’ faces.
A clever poem about facing life’s ups and downs together.
I’ll be there, my darling, through thick and through thinWhen your mind’s in a mess and your head’s in a spinWhen your plane’s been delayed, and you’ve missed the last train.When life is just threatening to drive you insaneWhen your thrilling whodunit has lost its last pageWhen somebody tells you, you’re looking your ageWhen your coffee’s too cool, and your wine is too warmWhen the forecast said, “Fine,” but you’re out in a stormWhen your quick break hotel, turns into a slumAnd your holiday photos show only your thumbWhen you park for five minutes in a resident’s bay And return to discover you’ve been towed awayWhen the jeans that you bought in hope or in hasteJust stick on your hips and don’t reach round your waistWhen the food you most like brings you out in red rashesWhen as soon as you boot up the bloody thing crashesSo my darling, my sweetheart, my dear…When you break a rule, when you act the foolWhen you’ve got the flu, when you’re in a stewWhen you’re last in the queue, don’t feel blue’cause I’m telling you, I’ll be there.
This classic song from The Beatles is a crowd favorite for a reason.
When I get older losing my hairMany years from nowWill you still be sending me a ValentineBirthday greetings bottle of wineIf I'd been out 'til quarter to threeWould you lock the doorWill you still need me, will you still feed meWhen I'm sixty-fourYou'll be older tooAnd if you say the wordI could stay with youI could be handy, mending a fuseWhen your lights have goneYou can knit a sweater by the firesideSunday mornings go for a rideDoing the garden, digging the weedsWho could ask for moreWill you still need me, will you still feed meWhen I'm sixty-fourEvery summer we can rent a cottageIn the Isle of Wight, if it's not too dearWe shall scrimp and saveGrandchildren on your kneeVera, Chuck and DaveSend me a postcard, drop me a lineStating point of viewIndicate precisely what you mean to sayYours sincerely, wasting awayGive me your answer, fill in a formMine for evermoreWill you still need me, will you still feed meWhen I'm sixty-four
A feisty marriage poem that packs a punch.
Yes, I’ll marry you, my dear.And here’s the reason why.So I can push you out of bedWhen the baby starts to cry.And if we hear a knockingAnd it’s creepy and it’s late,I hand you the torch you see,And you investigate.Yes I’ll marry you, my dear,You may not apprehend it,But when the tumble-drier goesIt’s you that has to mend it.You have to face the neighborShould our Labrador attack him,And if a drunkard fondles meIt’s you that has to whack him.Yes, I’ll marry you,You’re virile and you’re lean,My house is like a pigstyYou can help to keep it clean.That sexy little dinnerWhich you served by candlelight,As I do chipolatas,You can cook it every night!It’s you who has to work the drillAnd put up curtain track,And when I’ve got PMT it’s you who gets the flak,I do see great advantages,But none of them for you,And so before you see the light,I DO, I DO, I DO!!
The most quotable line from everyone’s favorite wedding movie—and a very funny wedding ceremony reading.
Mawwiage. Mawwiage is wat bwings us togeder today. Mawwiage, that bwessed awwangement, that dweam wifin a dream…And wuv, twue wuv, will fowwow you foweva…
Light-hearted song lyrics to make everyone smile.
I wanna be your vacuum cleanerBreathing in your dustI wanna be your Ford CortinaI will never rustIf you like your coffee hotLet me be your coffee potYou call the shotsI wanna be yoursI wanna be your raincoatFor those frequent rainy daysI wanna be your dreamboatWhen you want to sail awayLet me be your teddy bearTake me with you anywhereI don't careI wanna be yoursI wanna be your electric meterI will not run outI wanna be the electric heaterYou'll get cold withoutI wanna be your setting lotionHold your hair in deep devotionDeep as the deep Atlantic OceanThat's how deep is my devotion
We love the simple sweetness of this poem.
Rain has dropsSun has shineMoon has beamsThat make you mineRivers have banksSands for shoresHearts have heartbeatsThat make me yoursNeedles have eyesThough pins may prickElmer has glueTo make things stickWinter has SpringStockings feetPepper has mintTo make it sweetTeachers have lessonsSoup du jourLawyers sue bad folksDoctors cureAll and allThis much is trueYou have meAnd I have you
A poem of comedy and marriage advice all mixed into one funny wedding ceremony reading.
The way I see it, marriage is like my old car.When I bought it new from the dealership,everyone around me was saying; “Wow that’s a nice car!”It was all bright and shiny and worthy of admiration.And then as the years went by…there were places where the paint was starting to peel off.It got a little dent and a scratch or two here and there…and once it was over a decade old…People started saying; “Why are you still driving that old thing?”But my car ran like a top and would never leave me high and dry.Every time something sounded a little off, or needed attention,I got to work on it and fixed whatever needed fixing immediately,knowing that you get what you give.And then, when she became “a classic”,it was off to the body shop she went for a new paint job.People once again began saying; “Wow, that’s a really nice car!”But what they didn’t know was that all the things that really matter,were always things that nobody could see from the outside.A marriage is like my old car.It’s the maintenance you do between the high of the wedding day,and gaining the admiration your grandchildrenby being the couple who still laughs and shares secrets,and still holds hands after all these years.So don’t worry so much about what people think or say.Just do your oil changes, keep up with your maintenance,get out and have fun,don’t be afraid to blow the dust off now and then,and fix whatever breaks as soon as it happens.This is my advice for a marriagethat will motor successfully on down the highway of life.
Humor on the sweeter side, this poem is classic as can be.
Said the pelican to the elephant,“I think we should marry, I do.’Cause there’s no name that rhymes with me,And no one else rhymes with you.”Said the elephant to the pelican,“There’s sense to what you’ve said,For rhyming’s as good a reason as anyFor any two to wed.”And so the elephant wed the pelican,And they dined upon lemons and limes,And now they have a baby pelican,And everybody rhymes.
A clever little poem about growing old together.
Love me when I'm old and shockingPeel off my elastic stockingsSwing me from the chandeliersLet's be randy bad old dears.Push around my chromed Bath ChairLet me tease your white chest hairScaring children, swapping denturesLet us have some great adventures.Take me to your special placesWatching all the puzzled facesYou in shorts and socks and sandalsMe with warts and huge love-handles.As the need for love enthrallsWrestle with my damp proof smallsMake me laugh without constraintBuy me chocolate body paint.Hold me safe throughout the nightWhen my hair has turned to whiteBelieve me when I say it's trueI've waited all my life for you.
A funny wedding ceremony reading for the couple who doesn’t take themselves too seriously.
He never leaves the seat upOr wet towels upon the floorThe toothpaste has the lid onAnd he always shuts the door!She’s very clean and tidyThough she may sometimes deludeLeave your things out at your perilIn a second they’ll have moved!He’s a very active personAs are all his next of kinWhere as she likes lazy daysHe’ll still drag her to the gym!He romances her and dines herHome cooked dinners and the likeHe even knows her favorite foodAnd spoils her day and night!She’s thoughtful when he looks at herA smile upon his faceWill he look that good in 50 yearsWhen his dentures aren’t in place?!He says he loves her figureAnd her mental prowess tooBut when gravity takes her overWill she charm with her IQ?She says she loves his kindnessAnd his patience is a mustAnd of course she thinks he’s handsomeWhich in her eyes is a plus!They’re both not wholly perfectBut who are we to judgeHe can be pig headedWhere as she won’t even budge!All that said and doneThey love the time they spent togetherAnd I hope as I’m sure you doThat this fine day will last forever.He’ll be more than just her husbandHe’ll also be her friendAnd she’ll be more than just his wifeShe’s be his soul mate ‘til the end.
This sweet and simple song excerpt would be great read by a child.
There's no need to complicate itDress it up or overstate itWithout too much hesitationHere's the way I feelWell, I like you, I like youEven when I don't try toYes I do, that's the truthI like you
A children’s book reading with both humor and heart.
I like you a lotYou’re funny and kindSo let me explainWhat I have in mind.I want to be Your Personal PenguinI want to walk right by your sideI want to be Your Personal PenguinI want to travel with you far and wide.Wherever you go, I’ll go there tooHere and there and ev’rywhereAnd always with you.I want to be Your Personal PenguinFrom now on.Now lots of other penguins seem to do fineIn a universe of nothing but iceBut if I could be yours and you could be mineA cozy little world would be twice as nice.I want to be Your Personal PenguinI want to talk with you night and dayI want to be Your Personal PenguinI want to listen to whatever you say.Look at these wings, so perfect to hold youI’d like to say againWhat I have already told youLet me be Your Personal PenguinFrom now on.Now lots of other penguins seem to do fineIn a universe of nothing but iceBut if I could be yours and you could be mineA cozy little world would be twice as nice.I want to be (want to be) Your Personal PenguinI want to walk right by your sideI want to be (want to be) Your Personal PenguinI want to travel with you far and wide.Wherever you go, I’ll go there tooHere and there and ev’rywhereAnd always with you.I want to be Your Personal PenguinImagine me, Your Personal PenguinI want to be Your Personal PenguinFrom now on.